Children... The enemy?

I read an article the other day which had some interesting thoughts. I thought I'd share... what do you think

...In the beginning of the womens movement many battles were fought and won worldwide as women pursued the right to vote as equal citizens. After women claimed the victory to vote, the womens movement turned to fight for other causes. Until the mid twentieth century women were expected by society to work primarily in the home...

...the real devastating war began when women realised they would never be able to attain equality with men until they were granted reproductive freedom. Birth control became popular and finally women were able to have some control over reproduction... the sexual revolution ensued... children became the enemy in the fight for womens rights...

...Feminists proclaimed that its the children who ultimately keep women from experiencing true independence. To become a mother is to become a slave, forfeiting ones work, education, career, wealth and recognition for the sake of raising children... children, likened to parasites, as they leach the life out of women and prevent women from embracing any dream that lies beyond the front door. All along it was motherhood that kept women from experiencing true equality...

...Unborn children were the easiest enemies to eliminate, and every legal abortion became a victory in the march for womens rights... every empty home and empty womb became a tribute to feminism... But it is her own unborn child who sheds his blood for the freedom of the mother that he will never know. Is it not wretched that children die so women may advance in freedom? And women continue to fight to keep abortion on demand legal... Is this war truly worthy of the innocent blood of unborn children? How have women come to see their own babies as evil tyrants deserving of death?

Sarah Brown
published in "Above Rubies" issue seventy

biting more than we can chew

I have been processing this post internally for the past few weeks. I have a few different angles and maybe this will have to be a few posts in the end.

When Hannah was a newborn (shes now 10mths) and Isabella 17mths, my mum made a somewhat passing comment comparing mothers today and mothers back in the day when she was getting amongst with nappies and such. It was along the lines of how being at home and being a fulltime mum (to babies/toddlers) was considered a fulltime job - hence they didn't take on extra commitments and responsibilities outside of that.

Now the comment was made in a supportive and concerned way. She was suggesting the reason I was feeling completely overwhelmed was because she I was attempting to bite way to much more than I could chew. Of course I was quite disagreeable to this idea that I was overdoing things... however I have been mulling over this comment ever since.

I sense there is an expectation now that we can do it all. We get to the point in our lives when we start to have babies and think nothing else has to give. Sure, we give ourselves a mandatory 12 wk period off when baby arrives - from work or ministry, and then relaunch ourselves. Some go back to work, sometimes finances forcing their hand, juggling childcare and a career; others stay at home, taking on the fulltime childcare and household responsibility - a job we never "go home" from.

And I have to say it - it is probably those of us who have been highly motivated, high achievers, highly involved that have the most pressure to get back to it. And the pressure is mostly internal I think.

I think society has changed dramatically over the past 30yrs. Our lives are more complex and busy. As great as the feminist movement has been in some areas, it has made things really suck for women in other areas. Sure, we should expect to face internal questions about our changing role as we face motherhood, but why should we feel guilty, lazy or less significant when we contemplate letting go of some of the other stuff we do.

I've discovered I am not superwoman, although I suspect I will keep trying to be... I suspect my mum is right - some of us have ridiculous expectations of ourselves. We are trying to do too much - and we're paying the price... more on that later...