status update...

well, life has been ticking along and I have been ticking along with it - minus social media. I have realised sharing updates and photos has been such a part of the tick that any significant, funny, cute, thoughtful moment has been framed in my head as a "status update" how curious.. anyway, I did want to just pause and reflect on a few things, just to keep in touch..

I had my first game back at netball this past Saturday. playing in prem1 grade for Ardmore club. I have been trying to figure out the last season I played - I think I remember having a season or two with a baby /toddler on the sideline - so maybe it was around 2006 given this post... anyway. it was exhilarating to be back on court. and not to be struggling, but to be back in the zone so to speak. my smile was ear to ear. and the best part was when the other team started getting agro in the 4th quarter it made me just angry enough to play harder :)

today my friend Fran taught me to crochet! or at least she taught me the beginnings of how to crochet. I have managed to learn two stitches so far and im making a sassy little headband for myself. there will be more if I get faster and it remains easy peasy :) I have found my patience for handcrafts in the past has been limited, so I will run with this for as long as my excitement carries me! 

asha has this amazing ability to fall asleep - she lay her body over the couch next to me this afternoon as I mastered my stiches and although for a couple of minutes had a cheeky smile like she was pretending to sleep - she is clearly a pretty bad fake..

 

 

then last Friday I got to learn how to make sushi with the amazing Ginny at the Clevedon Family Center. these are some of the nom noms I created (and consumed) on the day. I am so inspired to get all the sushi ingredients and go for it now - it really was so simple. and that would be good given the sushi kit I was given by my sister a few yrs back. *cough cough* - time to use it for what it was actually made for!

 

and while im on food, my girls made lunch for us on the weekend. it was a feast of cake and fruit and little sandwiches. they set the table with a cloth, made place tags, had the glasses with little umbrellas. they really did a beautiful job. we feasted, and enjoyed, and I thought they were a great little hospitality team.

and we are settling in to our new place. loving the heat pump, and especially tonight as I think it might be the coldest night of our very mild to date Auckland winter - currently sitting at 7 deg, (feels like 5 deg). which reminds me of how much we are looking forward to visiting Inglewood in the school holidays to connect with friends, maybe see some snow and just have a get away as a family. and now that we no longer have to move house at Christmas, holidays away may become more of a tradition once more I hope!...

 

ok, loving you all,

Vania Xx

 

saturday night musings. post FB & move number 15

it's approximately 24hrs now since I signed out of FB. in the end, I didn't deactivate my account. I went to do so, and as I started the process, FB wanted me to pass on admin responsibilities for a couple of groups I am involved in and also for the page I have for 'pure mama'. Reuben my beloved had been telling me that de-activating was a little extreme and asking why I couldn't just stay off it..
I tried to explain
I didn't feel like I had the self-control yet. in the end, the compromise was to have him change my password and me to not know it.

this was proving very effective until this morning when I went to play music through my spotify account and realised that spotify DOES NOT WORK without logging in through your FB account. guts. I really love spotify and use it all the time in the car and when I go for a run. SO. its looking like staying off FB is very much to become a result of self-control. a decision of will. can I do it?... hmmmm. so far so good though. a brief moment tonight I wondered what the world was doing without me knowing about it, it was short lived however - phew!

and much more important news is that we have moved. again.
#15. following is a list of where Reuben and I have lived since we married in 1999.

1. august place, greenlane (5mths)
2. queens road, panmure (18mths)
3. mays rd, onehunga (3yrs)
4. mountain rd, mt wellington (9mths) Isabella born here
5. penruddocke pl, pakuranga (6mths)
6. portadown ave, pakuranga (1yr) Hannah born here
7. alma cres, papakura (4yrs) Isaiah born here
8. thorps quarry rd, clevedon (5mths) Asha born here
9. ardmore quarry rd, Ardmore (3mths)
10. thorps quarry rd (9mths)
11. north rd, clevedon (3mths)
12. thorps quarry rd (9mths)
13. north rd (3mths)
14. thorps quarry rd (2mths)
15. hyde rd, clevedon (...

the last month has been an incredibly stressful period for our whole family. the process of even deciding that YES, we were going to move again, has taken a huge emotional toll. on all of us. my 1st born is very sensitive, and of the kids has found it hardest. I think with the moves we have made over the last 3yrs she has always known that thorps quarry was our base, and that although we had to spend periods of time away, we would always return to it.

we own the home in papakura, but outgrew it. so just before asha arrived we found a beautiful rental in clevedon to move to and rented our home out. there was a catch however. the English owners are elderly and return to NZ each summer to visit family for 3mths. suitable long term houses to rent are hard to come by in clevedon where we have decided to be based, so we accepted our situation and made the most of it. in the back of our minds we waited and hoped that the home we had become attached to at thorps quarry would become long term. alas three summers passed and we had no assurance that it was not to become 4. as this long term possibility of a home at hyde rd presented itself to us just over a month ago, it seemed like we just couldn't ignore it as an option. there were complications though, and making sure this new home would work logistically surely hasn't been a simple process.

the week leading up to moving day (Friday 31st may) may well have been the most intense in - well - a long time?  on the Monday, out of about 50 possibles I was randomly selected for jury duty. charges for the case were kidnapping and robbery. the case lasted the full week - till 4.30pm Friday afternoon, when we delivered guilty verdicts on both charges. that was emotional on its own. reuben had to take the week off in order to be home with asha our 2yr old. BUT due to circumstances at work, ended up having to pull a (close to) all nighter, take her in to work with him for a morning, and work from home for much of the week. not so conducive to packing boxes right?! moving day arrived, and instead of the truck and movers arriving at 12pm as planned, they knocked on the door at 7.30am. yup. you can just imagine right?. I need not say more. off to court I went after madly packing the last of the boxes, getting the kids to school and settling asha with a friend for the day. meanwhile, the movers were doing their thing and reuben was on the computer logged into work. all of the events of that week were wrapped in a huge sense of sadness and disappointment that we had to leave this home. a place where we had invested ourselves and created memories in. not an ideal situation.

that week came close to undoing me, it came close to undoing reuben, their are some moments in that week that are best left unsaid, and put down to reactions due to huge stress.

this week just finished has felt like breathing fresh air in comparison. I feel the lightness in my heart and spirit. I notice how I don't get wound up at the slightest thing. there are cuddles and happy hearts and laughter and games emerging again. this house is very different to the last one. but this house I can unpack and give away the boxes (or even burn them!). this house is beginning to feel like a home. my home. I think there will be happy memories created within these walls. I am excited about nesting and creating and deciding how I want this space to look and feel and nurture those who come here.

and I am so grateful to God who is with me, who has been with me through every move, who has carried us through every move. the God who knows the future, who holds the past and walks with me in the present. I know I can trust him. I know he is faithful. I know he loves me. and I surrender to his plan for me and my family. as the song says. "you make all things work together for my good".

and I cant finish this post without saying thankyou. thankyou to the friends and family who have supported us, practically, emotionally, spiritually whether through packing boxes, cleaning, moving, buying me coffee, making me laugh, loving on and looking after our children so we could do what we needed to and praying for us. you are what fills my heart and I love each of you. and reuben. (just think Jerry McGuire - ok?) Xxx

when your head just wants to explode

rough afternoon at our house today. I have had two important things to achieve today for sunday. the biggest one being assisting in preparing a tag team presentation for our church community meeting, and the other being selecting songs as I am worship leading sunday night. these things had to be achieved TODAY, as I am working tomorrow, and then sunday has two separate events planned within the day before we even get to church.

now, its not like these two things were dumped on me today. oh no. I've had - lets say  - at least three weeks for both and two of those weeks would NOT have been in the school holidays if I had got myself organised earlier. but if you know me, my best work seems to be achieved under massive time pressure - which in turn makes my head seem like its exploding. [in fact it was the multitude of time pressured deadlines on me which probably was a huge cause of my near burnout last yr, but I digress...]

just to say really that its not fair on my kids for me to try and work for a number of hours under time pressure. they deserve better from me, and certainly didn't deserve me verbally venting my frustration on them when they just needed my attention. I have a long way to go with balancing all I try to do... just glad that I managed a little outing this morning for them on their bikes to our local café, and then off to the playground.

maybe it helps to redeem today a little for my kids?

i'm back

well its been a while, a LONG while. here i am. no longer a mama to 2 - or 3. now a mama to 4! just wanted to check in really, i am sorting out in my head whether to re-start this blog and also start a new one - or just start a new one.

Asha, my baby just turned 1 - she is such a delight. delicious yummy baby girl. being a mama to her, isaiah, hannah & isabella remains the biggest goal AND achievement of my life. they hold my heart. i strive to be my best for them. i fail often. mother guilt is an almost daily occurrence, but i continue the journey knowing there is no where else id rather be than at home with them.

i continue to dream about having my own business, about launching pure mama. i'm not short on ideas, plans, dreams, vision. i am time poor - its easy to guess why. and spending money on a business is certainly not a priority when a young growing family of 6 is consuming much of the available resource.

i re-started journalling this year. what great therapy that has been for my mind and soul. certainly i love reading the journey my life has taken in 9 short months. i am never short on ideas - that is certain! and perhaps this might become on ideas outlet also. we'll see,

selah x

remind you of anyone?

For anyone who knows or knew my Grandma and Mum, the likeness in these photos is uncanny!

(ps. face is mine, hair is not!)

letters on the mirror

I just had my shower - a part of my nightly bed routine. When i pulled away the shower curtain, looking back at me was the letter A and a few others carefully scrawled in childs handwriting on the bottom of our bathroom mirror... and I smiled...

Pre-children I was NEVER a neat freak. Cleaning is not my thing. I like things looking nice and being clean, I just never spent ages keeping things that way. I would generally spend the week living in our home doing the basics and the house would become more and more dis-organised and cluttered and then eventually I would go crazy and spend a day cleaning up again. This was my general pattern, even from when I was a kid (just ask my parents!).

Now that we have three small children, that pattern just doesn't work anymore - or at least it does in that it takes about half a day (sometimes less) for our home to look like a small tornado (or three) has been through. I therefore find myself constantly picking up and tidying these days. My kids sometimes bear the brunt of their mothers frustration at feeling like I am a continual house cleaner. I would really like to be able to just let it go as the "experts" advise us to, but the thing is that I know I feel better in myself when my home is tidy. Maybe part of the problem, is I am now contributing only a fifth (or less) of the mess, but feel like I am responsible for cleaning it all.

So back to those letters on the mirror - this morning while I was in the bathroom putting away some toys, Isabella (now 4) comes in and asks me to "watch this mummy". She then procedes to lick her finger and then use it to begin carefully forming the lettter "A" on the mirror. My first instinct was to snap and tell her to stop dirtying the mirror - but I bit my tongue this time. She turned around and smiled at me and said " look mummy, an A". We spent the next couple of minutes with her drawing more letters on the mirror with her finger... It was great!

So when I got out of the shower tonight and saw those letters - I smiled. Because my baby is growing up and becoming so clever, because it reminded me how much I love her and because it reminded me of the moment I might I missed this morning if I hadn't bit my tongue and overcome the urge of my currently dominant "neat-freak" attitude. And I am not going to wash away those letters - yet...

they say it comes in threes...

I am learning more and more about the differences between little girls and little boys - or at least my little girls and little boy. Isaiah is walking now - has his trainer wheels on. First steps at 10mths and walking by choice at 11mths. this is 2mths earlier than both the girls. He is still a smoochy little snuggler but also is always on the go - never stops for a second... anyhow this past week has been one not to repeat.

Tuesday
Isaiah pushed himself backwards off his booster chair which is attached to one of our dining chairs and smacked his head- this caused him to cry, then have a seizure, then go unconcious for a period. he earnt himself a trip to kidzfirst hospital in the ambulance and while there was taken to resus (where 10 doctors and nurses suddenly converged on him - SCARY!) cause he wouldn't respond to stimuli - as soon as he got there though he woke up... then had a CT scan. Everything was pronounced clear and five hours after the initial incident we were sent home. Next day you wouldn't know anything had happened...

Friday
At playgroup he starts crying and i recognize it as an "in pain" cry. he had something in his mouth and what do i fish out but - A BEE!! As it turned out he had been stung on his thumb not in his mouth and we now know he is not allergic to bee stings

Sunday
Tonight he fell off a small stage (with help from his sister i believe) and bit his lip and had bleeding from his top gum/teeth as well. Thankfully he settled quickly with a bit of magic soothing "mummy milk". He does have a fat lip to show for it though.

I'm sure this is just the beginning of many scrapes and bruises to come - how else would we produce and ALL BLACK captain for the future? but quite honestly I (and he) can do without another week like this one!

Three little cuties

Hannah, Isabella & Joshua on the steps to the church straight after Coralee and Alex got married

Coralee and Isabella

the longest blog drought ends

just a few thoughts for tonight...

• Today i had cause to reflect that I have proof against the big bang theory and subsequent development of intelligent life, right here in my own home. Let it be known that order tends to chaos and in my experience NEVER the other way around...

In my recent experience

• Having your first baby is hard cause everything is new, all the babies firsts are your firsts as well.
• Having the second baby is hard also. Although you are no longer a virgin parent, now there is the juggle of two to care for
• having the third baby is largely lovely. Its now third time around, you are now a seasoned multi-tasker, and third babies have to just fit in and go with the flow of the family. And fit in they do!

Psalm 100 - A psalm of thanksgiving

Shout with joy to the Lord, O earth!
Worship the Lord with gladness.
Come before him, singing with joy.
Acknowledge that the Lord is God!
He made us and we are his.
We are his people, the sheep of his pasture.

Enter his gates with thanksgiving;
go into his courts with praise.
Give thanks to him and bless his name.
For the Lord is good.
His unfailing love continues forever,
and his faithfulness continues to each generation.

Our sweet babe's arrival - my birth story

Today our newborn son is one week old. In fact as I write this and look at the clock, I'm reminded that exactly one week ago almost to the minute, we would having parking our car in the car park at birthcare (where we delivered) and heading to the birthing suite! For those who haven't caught up here are the details.

We have named him Isaiah Gary Toka te manawa (Isaiah pronounced I-say-ah, Gary after my dad, Toka te manawa - "contented" in Maori). He weighed in at 4555g or 10lb 1oz, was 57cm long with a head circumference of 36.5cm. I told you my baby was gonna be big!

As you know if you had been following my previous posts, Friday 7 Sept - Sunday 9 Sept I had been having contractions at a semi regular rate. I knew they weren't just good old Braxton-Hicks contractions because they had a bit of a bite to them. Completely manageable - just no longer pain-free. These continued through Monday and by Monday night I was semi-convinced it was all on. We decided this might be our last chance to capture the preggy belly shots, so here's one of 'em!
I texted RK (my midwife Rhondda) that contractions were regular at 10mins apart (still quite manageable) and headed to bed for an early night in preparation for what lay ahead. I was quite sure that at some point in the night I would no longer be able to sleep through it all.

5am Tuesday 11 Sept
Reuben had to make the decision about whether or not to go to work. We decided he would stay home as I was still contracting.

8am
everything has pretty much stopped. Me being quite keen to get it all going decided to go for a walk around the block. So out we all headed for a 30min stroll. On return home - still pretty much zero activity. I was pretty grumpy about it all by now, so we decided to send Reuben off to work and me and the girls headed out to our usual outing at playgroup in an attempt to distract myself. Text RK and tell her its all stopped. She tells me "Don't worry, it will happen soon"

1.15pm
I arrived home at after dropping Isabella at Kindy.

1.30pm
Go to the toilet and discover I've just had a show (google it if you want details of what a show is!). Feel both nervous and excited as I never had this with the girls, and realise I must be going to be in proper labour soon enough. Text RK and she says "keep me posted"

2pmContactions start again - 10mins apart and this time they are fairly uncomfortable - I want to move every time one comes on.

2.20pm
call Reuben who decides its time to jump on a train and come home

3pm
make the 10min drive to kindy to pick up Isabella. She wants to hang around and play - so I tell her we have to go because Coco is coming out today. She gets way excited and runs to her teacher Lisa to tell her Coco is coming out today. Lisa looks way confused so I - slightly embarassed - tell her that I am in labour and we need to go. Lisa gets into a panic and starts asking if I need her to look after the kids or drive us home etc etc. I say I'm okay and go to the car. Then Lisa and another one of the teachers come out to the car and frantically try to help with getting the girls strapped in, again offering all sorts of help. I again say I am okay and drive off to get Reuben from the train. I now have a massive adrenaline rush from the drama at kindy and wonder if everything is going to stop again.

3.30pm
Arrive at train - labour hasn't stopped and I am greeted with a lovely contraction as I get out of the car to move to the passenger seat. Reuben gets his first chance to try applying pressure to my lower back - relief!

3.35pm
At home getting bags for me, girls and reuben all together and in to the car. Sort out food for the animals. Have to juggle car seats around to try and find best place for me to be. Eventually decide on me being in front seat, kneeling on floor, leaning over bean bag. Me fairly calm, Reuben a little less calm!

4pm
Begin journey to my parents to drop off girls. Contractions now 7mins apart.

4.30pm
Arrive parents. Contractions still 7mins. Reuben calls RK. We are wondering if we should get in the car and go to birthcare as rush hour is fast approaching and birthcare is 25mins away when there is NO traffic. She says to meet her at birthcare at 8pm unless things really heat up.

5.30pm
Contrations about the same. Everyone having dinner at mum and dads. For some reason I am not interested in food right now!

6.15pm
Decide to have a shower and see how that helps me cope with pain. Is awesome relief! Love the hot shower on my back - coping really well - contractions suddenly drop to 3mins apart. I stay in the shower for 15-20mins and time contrations - yip, they are still 3mins apart.

6.45pm
Out of shower and tell reuben I'm at 3mins apart. He calls RK and she says - "time to come in!"

7.00pm
Leave for birthcare. Again a "great" trip. Reuben is doing a great job timing contractions, applying pressure to my back through contractions and driving the car. I knew there was more than one reason I have had two home births previously - contractions and car rides don't mix! On the way in I decide that I want the extra support and call my friend Kristen to ask if she can come support. She is able to come in and says she will see us there.

7.30pm
Arrive at birthcare - perfectly timed as RK drives in behind us. Great fun timing getting in and out of elevators as I have contrations.

7.40pm
RK checks me and I am 6cm dilated. Feel slightly cheated and wonder how much longer this will take! The birthing pool is already full and so in I get. The water is great - but almost too hot at 40 deg c. My contractions have slowed, but as I relax they start to pick up pace again and it is not long till I am concentrating hard through each one. In between contractions we chat and laugh about all sorts of amusing topics.

8.45pm
It all becomes a bit more serious for me as I enter transition. I just want it to be over and start telling Reuben that we are not doing this again. I get a bit grumpy but find the encouragement from everyone spurs me on and helps me concentrate. RK offers me gas but I am not sure if I want it - she tells me If I am not sure that I am better not to have it.

9.00pm
Urge to push... roll on second stage of labour. Feels good to have something to do with each contraction. I get a bit lippy and start asking RK "can you see it yet" she replies "oh yes love" I reply with a fair amount of tone, "how much". This converstions occurs at least twice more.

9.20pm
RK checks if waters have broken which they haven't. Asks me if I want her to break them. I say "no, not yet"

9.30pm
waters still haven't broken and are slowing things down. RK asks again if I want her to break them. I say "yes" and wish I had said yes earlier!

9.35pm
waters broken and I literally feel Coco come right down with next contraction

9.40pm
Head crowns and is out, shoulders are stuck. Reuben and Kristen have to help me stand up and with the next contraction I push Coco out - I am sure they heard my roar in reception! I am helped back to sitting down in the pool and handed my beautiful baby - its a second before I remember to look and there he is - my sweet baby boy. At this moment the pain is gone and Reuben and I are looking in awe at our first son - its an absolute magical moment.

welcome to the world sweet boy!

RK getting Isaiah all dressed for the first time

About an hour or two after Isaiah was born - out of the birthing suite and getting settled into "hotel" birthcare!

me and my babies - Isaiah day 1

sleeping in daddys arms - Day 2

Behold a Boy!

I have posted on my blog here http://offtherecordtoday.blogspot.com on updates of Baby Coco

r

update...

My Isabella is officially fully toilet trained - I am so excited! I won't go into details for sake of her privacy. She is a very private, sensitive little thing who insists on locking the door and being by herself on each visit to the royal room. Let me just say I am thrilled to now have only one daughter needing nappy attention during the day (at least for the next 7-9 weeks!)

She is changing so rapidly and this has been even more evident since she started kindy. Everything is replied to with a "why mummy?" Incredibly inquisitve and follows up with some very intelligent comments and questions...

My Hannah is such a darling, and comes out with hilarious comments and facials. One of the ones that make me laugh the most are when I put her ear drops in or wipe her butt (at nappy time) with a cold cloth... she puts on this funny face, shivers and says "dats weally told mama" (translation - that's really cold mama). The other one is after she fills her nappy, she comes up to either me or Reuben and says... "I done poooooos".

I wanted to pop in this pic of Reuben and the girls, cause its cute and they have so much fun together...












This one here is when we had a sleep out in the lounge a couple of weeks back. We toasted marshmellows in the fireplace and then put the girls to bed on mattresses on the floor in sleeping bags. Sadly they actually didn't last the night out there and we had to transfer them both back to bed at about 10pm. Kind of cool having a wee family night though...

The other exciting thing for me recently was being at my close friend Kristens birth - at least at her daughter Raegans birth. It was quick and intense and drug free. There is something amazing about seeing a new life being born, you can never really get over the mystery of it I don't think. It all brought it a bit closer to home for me though. In 7-9wks that's me! Thinking positive thoughts right now cause I know I can do it - again!

thats all for now - seeing Rhondda tomorrow (midwife) so maybe an update will follow...

27 weeks + 4

well, almost into the third trimester now. I know that these last 3 mths are going to fly by and there is still much to be done! Coco's room still has the girls toys in it (it has been their playroom since easter when they moved in together).

We have a couple of names picked for a boy, but at this stage absolutely nothing for a girl. I still swing to what sex I think the baby is. Some of my friends checked out the scan last week - but still, who knows! Kristen thinks I should of just found out, maybe I should of... the way my belly feels like its exploding, I still wonder occasionally if there's not two in there and the scanner just missed it! Isabella takes delight in looking at and touching my "fat tummy". I try to explain thats not quite the way to describe a ladies belly, I'm just hoping she doesn't go up to some other woman and tell her she has a "fat tummy"... Hannah knows exactly where Coco is when we ask her. She runs over, pulls up my top and either gives my tummy a kiss or points to it. We bought this cute book the other day called "Theres a house in my mummy". The girls love it and I think it has helped them understand a little better what is going on.

Better go, as Hannah is currently pulling off her pyjamas and I'm sure it won't be long till the nappy comes off also

x

Isabella's 3rd birthday and the week that was

I have to say that last week was particulaly hideous. Sunday morning (22 April) Isabella starts vomiting - and continues to do so for the rest of the day. I conceed that it is best for me and the girls not to go to church but send Reuben off at about 1pm as there are guest artists coming to play and he really needs to be there. Lots of fun cleaning up the continual spews with 18mth old Hannah "helping" me as much as she can. Monday sees Isabella wiped out and unable to attend her official first day of kindy

Needless to say Monday night cue Hannah starts vomiting about 8pm... and continues to do so for the rest of the night, finishing off at about 5am Tuesday. Sadly for her mother, Hannah seems to require no down time to recover and is as full of beans as ever. Her mother however feels like death.

Wednesday and Thursday I feel particularly bad, but thankfully no vomiting. Sadly all of Wednesdays outings are canned (being ANZAC day - a public holiday in NZ) and we continue to try and recover while Reuben does accounts all day at the computer

Friday night, joy, joy, Reuben starts vomiting and does so for rest of the night. He is then in sick/recovery mode for the following two days (at least). Saturday sees me freaking out about getting prepared for Isabella's party the next day while attending a wedding for most of the day. I prayed hard that day for lots of patience and compassion for my dealings with both my babies and husband... God really supplied my need that day with two friends being true angels.

Kristen did all my grocery shopping for the party prior to getting herself ready for the wedding (And then another quick shop on sunday morning). Truly, there would've been no food yesterday without her help. Then saturday night as I faced cleaning my home and icing the birthday cake it all went to custard again. Feeling utterly exhausted, the decorating sets pretty much disintergrated. A phone call to my neighbour Tiffany provided me with angel number 2. She came over, cake decorating set in hand, showed me how to put it all together and then set to attacking the piles of dishes in the sink. I did lament to God prior to her arrival how I wished for a dishwasher - and oh how he provided for me that night!

And I don't think the cake turned out that bad afterall!

Mum and dad, I hope you like these pics - Isabella and the rest of the whanau missed you guys yesterday! Hope you are enjoying Athens...

Isabellas birthday cake
Dora the Explorer

blowing out the candles

opening one of her birthday presents

talk about a lucky little girl with generous aunties and uncles, grandparents and even gt grandparents! This pic especially for you mum and dad (grandma and grandpop)

Today sees Reuben at home for another recovery day and fun with Isabella enjoying her real birthday day.

Coco now 21 wks - over half way! Lots of movements and I feel quite certain at present that it is another girl. This is a complete swing from 1st trimester when I felt certain it was a boy... I guess we will know in 19wks!

Isabella's 1st day at Kindy

24th April last week, Isabella opened an early birthday present from Mummy and Daddy (her new big girl kindy bag). We packed a change of clothes, a drink and her snack box, then off we set to KINDY!!

She is doing really well and loves going. It is such a great kindy with lovely teachers and a super environment. She's still building confidence though and hopefully soon she will be happy to say goodbye to mama...

and today is officially her 3rd birthday. Photos and a fresh post to follow!

Today I baked scones.

I thought I might make them plain but as I mixed the flour, baking powder and salt I realised I had to add sultanas to the mix.

It was quite appropriate. It is just one of the many things I remember Grandma for, and today is an important day to remember. Today marks one year since we lost her. Things have definitely changed since she hasn't been here. Extended family dynamics being just one.

She was never elderly to me. Never like some other peoples grandparents who seem old and fragile. Her first trip to hospital aside from childbirth was in 2004 for a hip replacement - she wore it out from simply being too active! For goodness sake! she was playing tennis. dancing, going on trips overseas with her friends, doing heaps in the community and with her church pretty much until the cancer took her energy and strength (and that was only a few months before she died). She knew what was going on in all of our lives because she took an active interest. Hannah was born in Oct '05 just before she was properly diagnosed - she couldn't stop apologising that she couldn't be there with me to help with the baby.

I miss her, we miss her.

Isabella 10wks being held by her gt grandma

Hannah 4wks, Isabella 18mths with their gt grandma
taken at Stanmore Bay 8/11/05

Hannah 3 1/2mths
22 Jan 06 at Stanmore Bay

A precious moment for Isabella (21mths) and her gt grandma
22 Jan 06

me and my Grandma at the beach house
22 Jan 2006

and to add to the mix of today being a day of remembering, we saw Coco at our 20wk ultrasound. How beautiful to see your child (kind of) for the first time. We also saw Coco on the screen at his or her actual size. Coco's little body currently would fit into the palm of my hand with her little legs dangling over the edge of my fingers. How I wished to take him out and cuddle him then pop him back inside. Everything looking wonderfully healthy and when asked if we wanted to know the sex of our baby I turned to Reuben... He replied... "no", and that was that.

yay for Coralee and Alex

My sister and her boyfriend Alex got engaged yesterday. So happy and excited for you both and glad that I get another cool brother! This photo I have shamelessly copied from Alexs' blog - it was taken just after she said "yes!"We told Isabella this morning that Alex and Coralee were going to get married and she replied - "Oh, I wanna get married too" This from the little girl who comes out of the bathroom each night after her bath with her hooded towel on her head with the end of the towel dragging on the floor saying "Look mummy, I got my married dress on". And I don't actually know what she saw to start mimicing being a bride.

Maybe this gives you males a little insight into how early the fairytale of getting married can begin for little girls. She's not even three years old yet!

noisy birds...

I got home tonight from pre-season Netball training about 8pm to find Isabella cuddled up with Reuben in the lounge. I was informed by miss two and a half that the "birds are too noisy mama, they need to go to sleep in their nest". Thinking this was the best excuse ever for not going to bed I went into her room and listened quietly... sure enough, there's some noisy birds outside her bedroom.

maybe i should be asking them to be quiet in the morning as well!